Difficult day

5 months 28 days since I delivered Ean Rigel. He was so precious, so perfectly formed for his development of 13w2d. He was delivered October 30, 2017 @ 10:30PM and was 4.25” long and weighed 0.96oz. He was such a tiny little baby but looked like a tiny baby and very obviously a boy. Today has been hard because it’s been two weeks since I delivered Riley Ember, I thought for sure this was our Rainbow baby, but it seems the plan was not to be. I miss my babies so very much. I had fought a headache all day that turned into a migraine by the end of the day. By the time my hubby came home from work I was bed bound due to the migraine and the emotions that became all consuming. I just kept thinking of our precious Ean Rigel and our precious Riley Ember. My sweet hubby joined me early and held me though I had no words I could put to how I was feeling. Finally, after a couple hours had passed I asked if he was serious about not trying again in the future and he said he was concerned for how I would be able to hold up physically, but we would talk about it more in time.