I'm Not Who I Once Was
Where I have been has brought me to where I am today, good and bad. Though I’ve made some bad choices along the way and surely life would have been easier if I hadn’t made those choices, I’m not who I once was. I can’t even begin to count how many times I have gotten upset when someone brings up something I’ve done wrong in the past. The irritation of knowing that there are times I’m not given a chance because of something I’ve done before. The anger and hurt that sets in because I feel not good enough, condemned and rejected. If I’m not careful the flesh takes over and I start to go over all their imperfections and mistakes in my mind and think “who do they think they are fooling themselves thinking they are without fault”. It’s then that I have to remind myself that I’m doing the exact same thing the other person was doing. I also have to wonder how many times I’ve not given someone a chance because I’ve held their past wrongs against them and I have to remind myself that maybe they aren’t the person they once were either. I have to remember that people can change as I myself changed. How do people change? Don’t we often hear the saying “you can’t teach an old dog new tricks”? In reality people can change. The Bible teaches us that once you become saved you are a new man because you are born again of the spirit, “2 Corinthians 5:17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.” As long as we are in Christ we are a new man and old things are passed away. Sometimes when we can slip away and become distant from God we can find ourselves going back to the way we were before because we are no longer in Christ. The remedy of that problem is easy, go back to God and be renewed. “Romans 12:2 And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.” We can decide daily to resist going back to the way we were and determine to not make the same mistakes. What we do today and this day forward is what rebuilds our past. We are not without flaws and neither were the people in the Bible. Many of those named in the Bible committed some devastating sins yet they went on to be used in great ways by God. We shouldn’t get discouraged by our past, instead we need to determine to keep moving forward through the power God provides us. “2 Corinthians 4:16 For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day.” Are you a new man and is your inward man renewed day by day or are you stuck in your past? I’m not who I once was.
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I'm a wife of 20 years to a husband that consistently chooses to love me despite my flaws and a mother of 3 wonderful, loving and giving children. I have 6 babies waiting for me up in Heaven. I'm imperfect, often broken and learning; you will see many aspects of what makes me the person I am throughout this blog. You will find no condemnation from me. I have my fair share of problems and battles, I win some and lose some but by God's grace I'm continuing in the good fight. I'm attempting to live life authentically and I enjoy the many blessings God has given both in happiness and pain. I don't have any formal education in Biblical Studies and I don't claim to be an expert. I'm just sharing experiences and lessons I am learning or trying to learn as I go through life.