I’m physically unwell today, I’m so very hurt, broken and distraught. I’m so angry, ANGRY that time my children could have had with their Granny was stolen by those that claimed to “love” them. “They love our children”, yet they purposely push them away and said they didn’t even want to hear their names spoken, this is love? Direct quotes from our children: “They never treated us very good anyway and were nicer to strangers.”, “I just don’t understand, I’m standing there and I want so bad to ask for a hug while she’s hugging everyone else but she didn’t even say hi to me.”, “I sometimes stay awake at night not being able to sleep thinking to myself if I was the problem, if I was the one that caused my family to hate each other, if I could just disappear and see if that would work, almost every time it brings me to tears.” Finally after many years my kids may understand it’s not their fault but they cannot comprehend why they aren’t loved by family and I pray they heal. My heart is shattered knowing that they know and feel this and we have explained it was an issue between adults they were at no fault. These people made it difficult for our kids to have time with their Granny while trying to say they weren’t and placed the blame away from themselves saying it was a scheduling problem with the grandparents. My kids missed time with a Granny they loved and cherished! OUR kids were robbed and time can never be replaced!!
I'm a wife of 20 years to a husband that consistently chooses to love me despite my flaws and a mother of 3 wonderful, loving and giving children. I have 6 babies waiting for me up in Heaven. I'm imperfect, often broken and learning; you will see many aspects of what makes me the person I am throughout this blog. You will find no condemnation from me. I have my fair share of problems and battles, I win some and lose some but by God's grace I'm continuing in the good fight. I'm attempting to live life authentically and I enjoy the many blessings God has given both in happiness and pain. I don't have any formal education in Biblical Studies and I don't claim to be an expert. I'm just sharing experiences and lessons I am learning or trying to learn as I go through life.