I didn't wait...

10/22/2018

I don’t wait to announce pregnancy because I want to celebrate the life of my baby no matter how short or long it may be. I appreciate the prayers received for myself and baby during pregnancy and needed the support after the losses. The magical 12 weeks is false, Ean was 13w2d when his heart stopped. Women need support and be able to share.

My Missing Peace
October 22, 2018 · My losses are something I have spoken of a lot about because I believe it is something worth talking about but after seeing a post telling someone to wait until 12 weeks to announce their pregnancy, I had to speak out for all the women/families out there.
There seems to be this rule that we should wait until 12 weeks to announce our pregnancies to make sure we are passed the 'safe' stage :( I am still unsure why this is (One thing I have learnt through all of this is there is no safe stage ). Is it because in 2018 we are still telling women that a miscarriage is something they should deal with alone or is it us as a society that is so uncomfortable with loss that we prefer not to hear about it? Have we not spoken about it for so long that we have no idea how too?

Well I was waiting, I was waiting to post my announcement! That post never came I found out I had lost my baby at 9 1/2 weeks. I told the people that knew, that were close to me but still so many people didn't know. I didn't know how to face the world when my baby had just been taken from me. I lost my closest friends at the same time and felt so alone. All I wanted to do was scream from the roof tops my baby was here!!! I wish I had announced my pregnancy and told people my baby existed. Even though I was early our baby was so loved. I announced I was pregnant to my now husband at our family photos so I could capture his reaction, this was going to be our announcement but I waited and it was the announcement that I never got to share. A baby is loved from the very beginning and if you want to tell the world on the day you found out go ahead because if you do happen to be the #1in4 you should not have to go through it alone! #breakingthesilence
You can all announce when ever YOU want to and if that means waiting then that's your choice! But this 12 week rule needs to stop!!! Women shouldn't have to explain why they want to announce before then and society needs to STOP telling women they should suffer their miscarriages in silence. I have had enough of it!
We must allow those who want the extra support if something happened to be comfortable to announce their baby!
I am calling it....
The 12 week rule is COMPLETE BULLSHIT, announce when ever the hell you want to, to who ever you want! It may be just family and close friends or it may be the whole world but don't let society make you feel like you should hide or grieve alone.
#celebrateallthebabies #announcewheneverthehellyouwantto
#12weekruleisbullshit
#breakthesilence
#thereisnosuckthingasasafestage

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Authentically ME

I'm a wife of 25 years to a husband that consistently chooses to love me despite my flaws and a mother of 3 wonderful, loving and giving children. I have 7 babies waiting for me in Heaven. I'm imperfect, often feel broken and I'm always learning; you will see many aspects of what makes me the person I am throughout this blog. Though the ups and downs in this journey through life I have learned and am learning so much, I'll never stop learning. I hold myself to impossible standards yet I know I am imperfect and will keep trying, I keep dusting myself off and getting up to go again. I understand the uniqueness of every situation and person, I am ME and others are who they choose to be; I don't have to agree with you or you agree with me. I make no secret of my standards, do NOT harm children, do NOT destroy others health (physical, mental, spiritual or financial); that's my boundaries and what it takes to have access to me. If this is too much to ask feel free to move along and I let go with love and genuinely want the best for your present and future. Healing isn't a place of arrival, it's continuous, I have healed from many things and I am still healing; like an onion healing comes in layers, like the tides; healing comes in ebbs and flows. I love, I observe, I learn and forgetting the past/history leads to cycles of chaos and I refuse to forget and not remember; I will continue learning from the lessons. I have my fair share of problems and battles, I win some and lose some but by God's grace I'm continuing in the good fight. I'm attempting to live life authentically and I enjoy the many blessings I have received both in happiness and pain. I don't have any licenses in Biblical Studies, or Health (physical, mental, spiritual, financial). I have background in military, health, service of others and individual trainings and research; I don't claim to be an expert on anything and I advise you to research and advocate for yourself as well as consult professionals. I'm sharing experiences and lessons I am learning or trying to learn as I go through life. Choose to remember but not fear, choose to enjoy the now and cherish priceless moments; look forward to changes knowing that lessons will come and more beautiful glimpses, love and joy are all available when you look closely at times from your past, moments within your present and the possibilities from your tomorrows. I am a survivor, I love deeply, I am a truth finder and I am a warrior, I am ME. Know you have strength, you have value, you are enough, you are worthy of peace and happiness, your boundaries are yours and it's okay to enforce them, you are loved, you are missed, you deserve support, your goodness to people and the world is noticed, you deserve to heal, your voice matters and you deserve to be seen and heard; best of all love yourself in your uniqueness flaws and all.

Remolding Clay

I didn't wait...

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